I have learnt to push aside self doubt.

This is week has been a huge mile stone in developing Support for Mums.  I held a pre-incorporated meeting to sign off necessary paperwork.  We also appointed a board for Support for Mums.  In attendance where seven intelligent, articulate and successful women who have all volunteered to be part of Support for Mums.

This week I learnt that sometimes ignoring your self doubt and running off your adrenaline and passion can be productive.  Self doubt can be debilitating and can often cause so many people not to take chances or risks and therefore not fulfill dreams.

I am so glad that I have put aside my self doubt and focused on my dreams which are now goals for Support for Mums.  A service that will assist so many mums and their families during circumstantial crisis.

Self doubt can also play a huge role in parenting.  We receive so many mixed messages from 'experts' about how and when we should be doing things with our children.  Does this expert advice just give us further self doubt about how we are raising our children and suggest that we are doing it wrong?

This week I have learned to put aside my self doubt and follow my heart and passion. This has not only increased my confidence it has also enabled Support for Mums to be at the stage it is at the moment with realist goals.

Does self doubt stop you from pursuing your goals?

 

Winners

I am so excited to announce the ladies who will be going to see 'What to expect when you're expecting' with a friend.
CONGRATULATIONS to

Easier Parenting
Jodi P
Aimee Watson
Salli Nuku
Bless this Mess
Nicole Calvert
Sharon Westin-Shaw
Jane Agius
Julie Ann Regan
Jo Warner

Ladies, Please email your address (don't put them on here) to joanne@ptconcierge.com.au and I will post to you a double pass to the movies thanks to Roadshow Films.  Enjoy, you all deserve it.

Jo ox

What to expect when you're expecting.

I am so excited to give everyone the opportunity to go to the movies and see
"What to expect when you're expecting."  I have seen it (first adult movie at the cinema's since kids) It was amazing.  I have even mentioned to friends that it could be the best movie I have seen.
As a mum, I could relate to so many scenario's through  my own life, friends or family.  I cried on at least 4 occasions and laughed out loud more than 5 times.  To me this is an awesome movie. 

Thanks to Roadshow films I have 10 double passes to giveaway.  To see this movie all you have to do is tell us what you expected or didn't expect when you where expecting at the bottom of this post.

I know what I was expecting wasn't reality.  I expected to have a 'normal' pregnancy, give birth (just like the books say) come home with a baby who breast fed, played and slept. (just like the books say) 

Starting with my pregnancy I did not expect to lie on my back in hospital for 2 months trying to keep baby in.  I didn't expect to change so many nappies.  I didn't expect to sit up all night with a sick baby (several times) I didn't expect to walk out of the house with baby spew on me and not care.  I didn't expect to cry just because and I didn't expect that I would ever feel so guilty for everything I did.

Please share what you expected or what you didn't expect.   

{one entry per person. Open to Australian residents only. 10 winners will be selected using http://www.ramdom.org/.  Winners will be notified by email.  Competition opens Wednesday 30th May and closes Wednesday 6th June 2012 @midnight EST}

Based on the 16 million copy best-selling book, WHAT TO EXPECT WHEN YOU’RE EXPECTING is an ensemble romantic-comedy in the vein of LOVE ACTUALLY and VALENTINE’S DAY.

The film is a modern look at love through the eyes of four interconnected couples experiencing the thrills and surprises of having a baby, and ultimately coming to understand the universal truth that no matter what you plan for, life doesn’t always deliver what’s expected.

In cinemas May 31

What I learnt this week, don't judge a book by its cover.

I have learnt and gently reminded not to judge a book by it's cover.

As a new school mum I am meeting so many new woman. When I first started I felt like I was a new kid starting school, new faces, new communications and so many new people to meet.

We all do it, some say human nature. We look at someone and make a judgement on how and what that person does.

I have done it for many years in my professional career making assessment and producing reports based on my educated assessment. I have it down pat in a professional setting but the school yard it's very different. 

There are mums running in trakies, mums with manicured hair, mums on there way to work and mums on there way to the gym. There are mums with full make up and mums with tired eyes and pony tails.

There are mums that look like they have it all together and mums who look exhausted. But really you will never know how she is feeling. What her morning was like, what day she has ahead until you get to know her. She may look like she is coping but really, although life is getting really hard.

Don't think she is coping because her hair is done and her make up is perfect. She's a mum with stresses, worries and pressure. Don't judge a book by it's cover. 

What I learnt this week - it doesn't matter if the bathroom is not spotless.

What I learnt this week. That my family doesn't care if the bathroom is not spotless. Saturday I cleaned the whole house, I dusted, cob webbed, vacuumed and mopped but the bathrooms got missed. Everyday this week I scheduled to clean the bathrooms, they're still not clean. I've had a busy week with a new client, a public holiday (through me right out), meetings, every day errands and they just never got done. Everyone has to-do list, (some longer than others) and everyone needs to know how to prioritise your list. Whether you have one new born or 5 children, are a working mum or stay at home mum. Whether you are a single mum or have a partner there are always chores to do and finding the time to get them all complete in 24hours is a tough gig. What I learnt this week (gently reminded) that it doesn't matter if the bathroom isn't spotless or your bed doesn't get made. It doesn't matter if dinner isn't ready at 6pm every night or your cobwebs seem to get bigger and bigger. Sometimes it's more powerful to let it go. Enjoy your week and keep learning ox

What I learnt this week - that sometimes I need to Jump.

Each week I hope to share with you what I have learnt for the week. It may not always be a blog. Sometimes it maybe a one line facebook status update.

This page was set up to share with everyone my progress and allow others to follow the journey as I set up a non-for profit organisation for mums and their families, for you. This is my main reason for keeping things transparent. I welcome others opinions, ideas and experiences. They will all go towards making this service awesome and supporting as many families as possible.

This week I have learnt that although all professionals, family and friends will say 'take one step at a time' I have found that I work a lot better when I jump. When my to-do list is so long I can't possibly get through it all, (but always written down often with sub lists).
I have always known I work better under pressure and with a time frame and jumping in, swimming but not sinking, is how I work best.

I have found this to be a great way to reflect on my week. To think about what I have learnt. I hope others will share what they have learnt.

I hope to continue learning forever.

A little bit about me and why Support for Mums

I thought I would should share my experience and why I am so passionate about establishing a service to support mums and their families.

At 25 +5 weeks pregnant I was at work in the CBD of Melbourne and had noticed I was leaking fluids. Something just didn’t feel right. I caught the train to my car and then drove myself to the hospital for a checkup.

Within 30mins of being in emergency I was told my fluids had broken I was 3 cm dilated and I would be giving birth within 12 hours. I was diadnosed with an incompetant cervix. This was not how it was supposed to be. Up until now I had a “normal’ pregnancy, (as normal as the book told me).

I was told my baby had 20% chance of survival and if it did survive, had a huge risk of severe medical difficulties and or disability. I cried for unborn baby.

I was pumped full of medication to try and slow down my labor and we waited. I lay in my hospital bed for 9 weeks. I lay down to eat, bath. I lay there 24 hours a day and only left the room lying down when wheeled for my next ultra sound. I kept my baby with me until 36+6 weeks and he was born a healthy baby boy.

During this time it was very exhausting for my husband, coming into the hospital daily after work. This left him limited time for general house hold chores. When our son was born my muscles had completely vanished due to bed rest. I was unable to walk distances or hold the baby for long periods. I had to slowly build myself up to cleaning and groceries. When he was 3 months old I knew something was not right. My maternal health nurse referred me for counseling and I was diagnosed with post traumatic stress. I also had to grieve my pregnancy and the emotions that I had kept at bay for so long while I concentrated on growing my baby and once born, keeping my baby fed and helping him grow. After many sessions I felt I was strong enough to move from that place. (oh, to be a fly on the wall and watch a counselor treat another counselor!)

We got through it and although petrified, started trying for our second child. When I was 13 weeks pregnant I got a cervical stitch placed in to prevent dilation. I was on complete bed rest from 17 weeks and had two hospital admission for over a week with contractions 3 mins apart (ironically 25+5 weeks again) This time it seemed even harder as I had another little person to care for. I was not allowed to cook, clean, shop, drive or look after my family. I was lucky to be able to access child care, have an amazing girl friend come and cook us dinners and put them in the freezer, a cleaner and a very supportive but exhausted husband.

On discharge from hospital the Obstetrician was not going to let me out until I had all these supports in place. The social worker at the hospital did not have the resources and was unable to assist. I organized it from my hospital bed so I could go home and kiss my 2 year old into bed each night.

At 34+5 my stitch was removed due to severe pain and I dilated immediately and my second son was born. Again I was very weak and had two young boys to look after. I used my initiative and made an appointment for counseling to prevent going to the place I had before.

This is my story and a reason I hope to get Support for Mums service up and running as soon as I can. I feel I was lucky to have the resources available to me to get through my pregnancy and post natal period although understand that many other women are not as fortunate. I am very passionate about providing appropriate resources for mums to assist in recovery and/or their journey in motherhood.

ox